Once upon a time, when I was younger than I am now, I used to conjure up dreams, and thoughts that would lull me off to sleep. I used to listen to the wind and the rain on the window, and I just loved that sound. As a small, (literally) girl, I could imagine anything and absolutely everything in my dreams and I just thought that was the reality of life, but as an adult, I realise this is not how life works.
As I hate this un-natural form of writing, I will stick with it for now, otherwise it may well become illegible.
Now, at fifty years old, I have a very firm grasp on reality, and realise all the positive and negative aspects attached to that reality. As a small child, you see the world through your limited experiences, and as you grow up. you are exposed to so many new ones.I would personally say, never, ever pass up the possibility of making your own life happy and good, and don't allow others to dictate to you or spoil who you are.
As always I appear ambiguous, but that is not my particular intention. Rather, I use ambiguity to make a point about many individuals. Most of them are good, but occasionally one is not, and it is sad that they have passed over, but nothing ever is forgotten. Nothing can be eradicated from your memory, merely moved.
As usual I am being serious, but that is just me, however, I never tell lies.
I look at my whole life and mostly I see all the good parts of it, which are many, and I am truly grateful for all those wonderful experiences with my family and friends. There is a terribly precious relationship with your family, and it's even more precious when it becomes your own little one. Nothing in the world will ever be more important to me than my daughter, husband, granddaughter and cats. (No order , merely wrote in that way.)
I am terribly proud of my husband at present, and always, as he is such a talented writer, and I was first exposed to his musical talents, ( A hunch, as at that point, I hadn't heard him, but so glad I did. ). Then I was introduced to his massive talent for mimicry, and told him he would be a brilliant Puppeteer, But I rather think he was unimpressed. I still have "Mappy and "Snowy", and never shall I part with them.
My husband is so, so talented, but I must agree that he utterly excels with writing.
I used to devour books as a child, and I listen to his stories to Sian, and she's captivated ; So am I. :-). When my own daughter was little, I used to make up stories for her, and she loved them. She in her own her own right has a complete talent for writing, which she will never lose, and she excels in acting.
What of my lovely Sian. She already, at four years old displays massive musical talent and everything of her mum's talent for acting. I guess these talents are inherited and just continue through generations
My brain wants to just write in my untidy fashion, but I am so in the mode of thinking of how to space etc, that my brain, I think, has just shut down. :-). I suspect I am being sarcastic.
Well , what of my own talents? I have a few, and I am a 'disaster' at what I do not know but am gradually learning. All my life, I wanted to play piano, in fact I would love to learn any instrument, and did learn violin, but everything is restrictive, and I did quite well with piano and not to bad with violin too, though I found that a harder instrument to play, in techniques etc. but it was very personal, and at heart I am a Pianist and I can play. My brothers are musicians, whom I have always thought were better than me, perhaps because of my nervousness and dislike of performing, but they think I am good.
In the end, it comes down to your own confidence, and if destroyed by anyone, which I am sure we have all experienced, it very much depends on your own personality of how you deal with it all and in the end, we will all cope in a different fashion.
People should always be true to their nature, no matter what. I will always, always believe this.
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